The iconic gala after school has been and will always be a thing for students like us regardless of what level we are in the academe. It allows us to bond with our friends and classmates, explore new places, try delicious foods, and gain fresh experiences.

But as for Jireh Velasco, a 22-year-old and graduating Broadcasting student at the Polytechnic University of the Philippines, the after-school gala is no longer part of her life. She used to be excited about it before, but everything has been different now that a little angel has completely changed the trajectory of her life.

It was last year when Josiah Ezra came into her life. Since Jireh was still in school, she initially found it hard to realize that she would be having a baby. But the once-difficult moment of her life turned into Jireh's favorite part where she'd always wanted to come home right after school instead of hanging out a bit longer with friends. That's how her “yes” to every gala after school turned into “I’ll just go first, I have to,” knowing a little angel is waiting for her at home that she should put to sleep.

Bearing the strain of judgment

Jireh never had trouble saying no to her friends since they would still extend an invitation to her even though they knew she would probably turn them down. They acknowledge and understand that Jireh's priorities have now shifted.

However, like everyone else who gave birth while still in school, Jireh faced unwelcoming criticisms from others. Living in the province of Cavite, she'd received comments such as “Ah, pumapasok ka pala?” and backhanded compliments such as “Mabuti nakapasok ka pa!” with stereotypical statements that women can't multitask and can only perform housework for their spouse and child after they become a mother.

Remarks like "Paano yun, saan mo iniiwan yung anak mo?,” “Aalis ka na naman? Yung anak mo, paano?” makes her upset and wants to give up and just cry it all out at night.

Setting aside the ‘Me’ within

Nevertheless, Jireh always sets her mind to thinking that those judgments weren’t as important as her child—that those words won’t feed and care for their child. For her, the biggest sacrifice she could ever give for her child is herself, her whole being. The transition from being a child, a sibling, and a student to being a parent greatly affected her emotional health, alongside the effects of her postpartum.

“Kaya ako, sina-sacrifice ko talaga yun. Yung pag-iisip ko kasi, if hindi ko siya nilalabanan baka wala nang nag-aalaga sa anak ko ngayon,’” she shared.

New mothers like Jireh are the ones who usually experience postpartum “baby blues” sadness. Based on an article from the Mayo Clinic, mothers who just gave birth usually experience worry, mood changes, sobbing fits, and trouble sleeping.

But what drives Jireh to fight the struggle and continue to sacrifice is her baby Josiah, the one she offered her life to and will continue to offer her life with.

Jireh’s life as a student and a mother is what made her strong today. She knows the struggle, the judgment, and the sacrifices she had to make.

“P’wede nating sabihin na huwag mo na lang pansinin at hayaan mo na lang [yung judgments] pero hindi ko rin naman maitatanggi na may impact pa rin yun,” she said.

Day by day, she learned to take every judgment as a motivation, thinking that if she gave up, it would seem like she's just proving what others had been saying about her.

At the end of the day, nothing can ever equate to her feeling of being able to give comfort to her child as she watches him sleep soundly beside her. No judgment from other people, no sacrifices, and no missed gala after school could compare to the ease that she feels every time she becomes a mother to her son. Behind what she's been through, Jireh stood tall behind side eyes and silent senses not just as a mother, but also as a woman.